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Emerging: A Book, a Pregnancy, and Summertime

I’m back. In so many ways, I feel like I’m coming up for air after a long, long time.

I finished my book, or at least the first draft. I submitted it to the publisher a few weeks ago, and it’s now at the mercy of peer-reviewers. Like any big project, this is a huge weight off of my shoulders. It has commanded so much of my attention and energy over the last 18 months that I feel an almost unsettling freedom in each block of free time that comes my way. Where do I put my energy next? Between traveling, a much-reduced childcare schedule, and a sick Cee, I haven’t had much free time. However, since finishing my book, I’ve suddenly noticed cobwebs in the corners of our house, that our living room was still full of toddler toys that Cee never plays with, and that she had commandeered the lower shelf of the pantry for now-forgotten objects like band-aids, old catalogs, puzzle pieces, bottle caps, and pieces of gravel from the driveway. For a couple of days, all I wanted to do was clean and organize.

Another weight has lifted, too. I’m pregnant! Finally. It turned out that it took me longer to make a baby than to make a book. I’m now 15 weeks pregnant, and everything looks healthy so far. This experience – of trying to conceive, infertility, and pregnancy loss – has been more difficult than I imagined. When I tackled writing the book, I knew that the final product would be a result of how much time, effort, thought, and desire I put into it. Not so with getting and staying pregnant. This has been a lesson in relinquishing control and in patience. Having made it through the anxious first trimester, I’m now trying to adjust my attitude from one of bracing myself for something to go wrong to enjoying the pregnancy and letting myself think ahead to a new baby in December.

And now, it really feels like summer. I’m not teaching at all this summer, the first term I’ve had off in nearly two years. We’ve cut Cee’s childcare schedule way back to just a few mornings per week – just enough to give me a little time to write and edit the book as needed. We’re taking a few trips, catching up on appointments for our whole family, and sharing good meals made from our CSA produce. Best of all, we’re spending time together.

Cee and I especially need this. Over the last few months, my husband and I were doing a lot of baton parenting – both of us working long hours and then taking turns with Cee so that the three of us were rarely all together. I was starting to feel like my limited time with Cee was spent in too many battles and limit-setting and not enough connection and cooperation. Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve been thinking about and putting into action a sort of parenting reset – trying to think clearly for the first time in a while at what is working and what isnโ€™t and being intentional about how to change it. Happily, I already feel like we’re back in a better place, and I’m looking forward to lots of time with her this summer.

I’m also setting my intention to getting back to regular blogging this summer. I plan to post at least once per week, maybe a bit more. I’ll be blogging about pregnancy, miscarriage, infertility, babies (of course!), and some of my current parenting journey. I have a long list of topics accumulated over the last year or so, but I’m always open to new questions; if you have topic ideas, send them my way!

I’m really looking forward to blogging and engaging with you all again. Thanks for all of your kind notes over the last few months and for bearing with me. It’s good to be back!

39 Comments
  1. Aarti Pani #

    Congratulations! So happy for you on all fronts! I’ve been rooting for you! Also standing with you in connection with our kids and what’s important and how to get there! Aarti

    >

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  2. Alice #

    Really happy to see you back here! Since you’ve been gone I have referenced more than one of your old posts – especially about toilet learning. Looking forward to hearing more from you!

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  3. Congratulations on … well, everything! That’s a lot. I’m pleased to see you back and excited to check out your book when it comes into the world.

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  4. Gena #

    Hooray on all accounts! What a wonderful update, everything feels really good!

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  5. Congrats on the book and the pregnancy! Looking forward to reading your new posts!

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  6. Amber #

    Thank you for sharing! ENJOY the Summer! Aya is so excited to hear Cee will be a big sister-what a beautiful journey.

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  7. r #

    So happy for you! Congratulations!

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  8. Amber #

    Great to see you back! Can’t wait to read your book! As a mom of 3 and an engineer (my scientist side), I can’t help but wonder if there is a scientific basis for the way we treat our kids when they are different genders. I have 2 boys and a girl and when my daughter came along, the way I deal with her is much different than my boys. I am not sure if it is because I know what she will go through and I want her to be independent and strong or if she just reacts to things differently because she is female. Not sure if it would be an interesting topic, but wanted to throw it out there. Looking forward to your future blogs!

    Like

    July 8, 2014
    • thisamaceinglife #

      I wonder about this as well! Would love to ponder it …

      Like

      July 9, 2014
  9. Congratulations on the book and your pregnancy! I’m also pregnant and it sounds like we’re at about the same part of the journey. I’m due Christmas Day. I truly enjoy your blog. Thanks for posting the updates. Good luck with the feedback from your peer-reviews!

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  10. Congrats an all accounts! I also look forward to your future posts and I enjoy your thoughtful writing style and the topics you cover. I would love to learn/hear more about differences between first and second (or subsequent) pregnancies as I’m 13 weeks along myself the second time around. Nutritional reasons (for mom and baby) for spacing children out by certain lengths of time is fascinating to me too.

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  11. I accidentally wrote this on your book page (whoops!) so it’ll make more sense here… Just ignore the other one :-p

    Congrats on all fronts โ€“ book, pregnancy, reconnecting with Cee, & having free time! I canโ€™t imagine how hectic & trying the last year has been for you! Looking forward to the book & blog posts in the mean time ๐Ÿ™‚

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  12. Congratulations!!! So great to have you back!!!

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  13. Congratulations! All so awesome.

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  14. Welcome back and congratulations at your pregnancy! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Like

    July 8, 2014
  15. I know your feeling because I have the same experiences of you. Congratulations! Look forward to reading your new posts!

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  16. Congratulations on all fronts! I just started following your blog because I was so moved by your personal story and the helpful nutritional tips. I have a three year old and a baby and blog about our travel adventures and fusion parenting (husband is Japanese). Keep us posted on the book!

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  17. Welcome back. I have missed reading your posts and have been experiencing my own pregnancy loss. We have lost two in 3 months so not a very good record ๐Ÿ˜ฆ I would appreciate you sharing your own experiences but only of course if you are ready and able – hope all continues fine with the current bub.

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  18. b #

    Congrats. Hope everything continues well.

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  19. Yay! So glad you’re coming back and so happy to hear your good news!

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  20. thisamaceinglife #

    Congratulations!
    We have been missing your posts! Could not be happier for you… Cee and my son are very close in age as a result your posts have been incredibly helpful to me! Thank you! Enjoy your pregnancy, whenever I worried about my early stages of pregnancy, getting into the pool and swimming cured all!

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  21. CONGRATS!!!! On both the book and the baby. It’s nice to see you back.

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  22. Catherine Becker Reynolds #

    You have made my day by posting your cheerful news on all fronts, Alice! You sound so excited, relieved, and happy with your accomplishments. Relax and enjoy your family time with Cee. Extra
    -busy days and wakeful nights are just over the horizon–yippee!

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  23. Welcome back and congratulations!

    Like

    July 9, 2014
  24. sam-c #

    congratulations on all of the good news in this post!

    Like

    July 11, 2014
  25. sam-c #

    congratulations on all the good news in this post!!

    Like

    July 11, 2014
  26. congratulations on all the good news in this post!

    Like

    July 11, 2014
  27. Christine #

    Congratulations! I just stumbled upon your blog a few weeks ago and have really enjoyed reading through it. I’m glad to see that you plan to continue.

    Like

    July 14, 2014
  28. shunsak3 #

    Congratulations, Alice! Keeping you and your family in my prayers. Thanks for all you’re doing to help make the world a better place!

    Like

    July 17, 2014
  29. Congratulations! I’m so happy to hear the big news!
    You always show such wisdom as to what your family needs. I’m really looking forward to your coming posts.

    Like

    July 18, 2014
  30. Thank you all for your wonderful comments! I’m always amazed at the support I feel from this community of blog readers, and I’m looking forward to being around a bit more now that my life has settled out:)

    Like

    July 20, 2014
  31. Anya #

    Congratulations on all fronts! I came back here today and saw the best news possible. I can relate to you on so many levels. I, too, have a 3 year old daughter, am a scientist by day and an avid reader on child development. I am also feeling incredibly blessed to be18 weeks pregnant after two losses in 2013. Can’t wait to read your book!

    Like

    July 28, 2014
    • Oh, congratulations Anya! We do seem to be on parallel tracks right now (except the scientist-by-day part, but I can relate!). I’m 18 weeks now too!

      Like

      July 28, 2014
      • Anya #

        Alice, I hope your baby has arrived safe and sound and you are enjoying baby snuggles! Our beautiful daughter T was born on Dec 30 ๐Ÿ™‚

        Like

        January 9, 2015
        • Anya, I somehow missed this comment back in the haze of early parenting with BabyM. Congratulations! I hope things are going well with your daughter. I can’t believe how quickly the time is passing. It’s cliche, I know, but I just treasure these early months. All my best to you!

          Like

          May 6, 2015
  32. Alison Merlo #

    Congratulations Alice! I was so pleased to read this post. I have really missed you!
    Alison

    Like

    July 31, 2014
  33. Have been checking in periodically, and am so happy to find that I am a few posts behind! Congratulations, so good to see you back ๐Ÿ™‚

    Like

    August 6, 2014

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  1. How My 3-Year-Old’s Sleep Fell Apart | Science of Mom
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